Friday, July 5, 2013

And, baby got back?

So, I'm back, I hope.
 I've been yo-yoing and that's never where I want to be. I take off weight by watching what I eat SO carefully, but then I get sick of never having "treats" and so I put weight back on, then off, then on ... bah.
The funny thing about this? I feel so much better about myself now than I did two years ago. I feel accepting of myself and my body. I know that my body is mine. It will never look like someone elses, and I can treat it with dignity and respect and give it (and myself) what it deserves. This is my body. It is mine, there is no body like it.
 It has its faults -- I personally believe it should be able to run faster, but it doesn't agree with me so much. I also feel like it likes to be pretty curvy, that's great and all, but I would appreciate a little more curve inward on my stomach instead of outward :) The beautiful thing about my body is how it responds when I treat it right.
 When I eat things that benefit instead of things that just satisfy a sugar craving my body responds in amazing ways. More fruits and vegetables? You might as well put a halo on my head because the way I feel makes me glow. More sugar and less substance? I'm lethargic,  cranky, dare I say moody?
 Anyway, I'm hoping posting this will help me work through my feelings instead of eating my feelings. What I want for myself? Health. If that's at a size 16 or a size 8, I could really care less, I just to be healthy ... and to keep the booty my extra weight has brought me. It may not be much, but it's mine.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

5k #4 2011

39:19.

I have shaved 2:20 off my 5k time! Very exciting. The Fools 5k was my first outdoor 5k this year. Let me say, harder than the treadmill.

I've been preparing for the outdoors. My treadmill is set at an incline and my legs are toughing out the times, but still, I was sore. Much more sore than I have been with my virtual 5k's. I think part of it was because I was pushing it. That pushing it resulted in a 5k UNDER 40 minutes. Yes. I'll take that.

The other good news? I want to be faster. A co-worker who I consider to be a goddess in the running department has helped me work out a little schedule to become a little faster. That schedule? Speed runs. I winced a little when I said it. So, walking for a mile to warm up, then running AS FAST AS I CAN for one minute. Walk for two minutes to bring my heart rate down. Repeat. Three times.

I'm going to be doing a speed run once a week, a long run once a week and two easy runs. And by easy runs I mean runs that are comfortable, easy to talk during and don't leave me feeling fatigued. So I'm changing one easy run to a speed run and then adding another easy run back in there. We'll see how it goes! I think I'm going to do my easy run and then lift, at least for one workout, if not for both. That way I will be working out every other day and I'll be giving my body some time to recover. We'll see.

My next goal? To run a 5k in less than 36 minutes. I may not hit that goal by my May 5k, but I'll be on my way there. Then, when I hit that, I'm completely and utterly aiming for a sub-30 minute 5k. It's doable, completely doable.

I'm excited after this last 5k. I'm excited to keep training. I'm excited to see what my body can do this year when I really push myself on my running instead of haphazardly throwing it in when I feel like I should.

I have a July 5k set in Ames, but am still looking for a June one. I know there's one out there, but there's always the trust treadmill. It might even be good to treadmill it to give myself a slight break. Speed baby. That's the name of the game over the next couple of week. Who knows, next time I may beat a turtle!

Monday, March 21, 2011

There is a time

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-7
 1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:  2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
 3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
 6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
 7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,


Now is a tough time of year. It's officially Spring, but there is still snow in some places and more might be coming, according to the weather person. This is when my feet long to feel the pavement moving under them. This is when I want to cast out all the winter air left in the house and let warm breezes make it smell like lilacs and sunshine. I long for winter to feel like it's really over.

I have to remind myself that it's coming. There is a time for Spring, just like every other season and it's coming. Just as in the middle of Summer when I'm wishing for cooler breezes, now is the time to enjoy the surprises of the season, hard as that may be. It's one thing I'm not good at, wanting something and not being able to have it. Like most American I like immediate gratification. I like things when I want them. I'm trying to exercise my patience right now, hoping for Spring to get here but enjoying the Thunderstorms that may or may not bring a white dusting to my lawn.

The verse above, my favorite with one of my favorite songs to match, helps me remember that there is time yet. While I may be waiting for Spring to come, now may not be the time. When I get impatient and want to be healthy, fit and running 13.1 miles right now, it may be something to build up to. The time will come and when it does I will be ready. I will be ready for Spring, I will keep training and I will be ready to run. I'm preparing myself for that time. There is a time, and it's coming.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

2011 5K #3

41:39

Easy run 2:1 intervals and WOO HOO! A nice run, not very much pushing on a pretty hilly course and I'm still down almost 3.5 minutes from my run a little less than a month ago. I'm loving it.

I'm trying to gain a little speed, hence starting over on my intervals because while I like running I want to be just a BIT faster. When I'm running I'm in between an 11 and 12 minute mile now, it's the walking that I need to work on. Just building up that endurance, but it's so fun to watch that 5K time drop every month!

I think I'm going to sign up for a real 5k for April instead of my virtual ones. It's nice enough out now that in 2-3 more weeks a morning run won't be horrid. Then there's also over 6 weeks before the 5K that I really want to run back home, so I won't be pushing myself too hard right before another race.

I've added weight lifting to my exercise regimen. Twice a week I'm doing a 45 minute workout and it's lunges, squats and everything galore. I did it after my run the other day for the first time and whew. I understand why that's supposed to build endurance. Here's the thing, I feel stronger. When I run hills it's slower than I'd like, but I feel myself pushing up those things and then coasting down.  When I run on flats I can feel my from and my legs just pushing forward and I adore that feeling. My breathing is good and as long as I don't go to fast right now no side pain. (The other day I went way too fast on a 2-mile run and oy. I walked a bit of that one).

I'm so happy with where my exercise is right now. I feel like I'm pushing but I'm not burning out. If I need to skip a run and do it the next day I can. If I need to cut my 3-mile run down to 2-miles I do. I'm listening to my body and just enjoying what I can accomplish right now. I can't wait until my final 5K in October because I'm excited to see where I am after running through the heat and humidity of the summer and then becoming stronger because of it. Who knows, maybe I'll tough it out and become a winter runner, too!

All in all, I'm ecstatic with my progress and hope to have more good news to share with you through the year!

Friday, March 4, 2011

Be motivation

We talk about motivation. About losing it, finding it, wanting it. As people wanting to change their lives and keep up the momentum motivation is a big part of a day, whether we realize that or not. We sometimes "need" to be motivated to work out and eat well. Sometimes I disagree with that and other times, when my butt is dragging on the ground from the moment I wake up, I see the truth in motivation.

What I realized last night, laying in bed waiting to doze off, is that we are motivation. Our actions and thoughts can move someone to change their life. I'm not saying all we have to do is say it and it will be, but someone seeing us in action and observing the benefits we've obtained through healthy living can cause a chain reaction and before you know it, your life has changed others.

Now, I'm not saying that my actions are the only reason these people have changed their own lives, but I'm saying it plays a part! I've talked about wanting to lose weight and wanting to be healthier for a long time. I've dabbled in it, going on diets, pushing exercise for a little bit at a time and sometimes I did pretty well. When I started this journey it seemed like everything fell into place.

Now, the SO has decided to run a 5K with me this summer and we both eat healthier than we did five years ago. After hearing about me running my first 5K near my hometown last year, a lifelong friend decided she was also going to reach for that goal. Last I heard she was running faster than me and well on track to having a strong finish in the May race. When I found out my father was diagnosed with diabetes, and thinking of the history of obesity, high blood pressure and all that comes with it that runs in our family, I decided to take my own first steps into making my life a healthy one.

We are motivation. Every positive choice to make, every decision that leads you to a better, healthier life is one that can lead someone else there as well. The days you struggle to work out and the days where all you really want is a chocolate chip cookie remember that. Remember the look on the face of someone you have touched. Remember that when you give it your all on the elliptical at your gym you may be giving someone else the inspiration to keep going, too. When you pick up carrots instead of cupcakes at your grocery store someone may see. Be motivation.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Knocking elbows down

I'm a little competitive. I'd like to tell myself that I'm not, but I enjoy winning like everyone else. The thing is, I'm not competitive because I want to win. I'm competitive because I want to be good. I want to be better and do better and sometimes, if I'm not, I feel like a failure.

I want to run faster and longer because it's a personal goal. But I also want to run faster and longer because I could "beat" other times from other people. If I don't reach those times or goals I won't quit. I don't know if I'll ever quit running because I get so much enjoyment out of it. But I do want my feelings of failure when someone else performs better than I do to become feelings of enjoyment for them in their victory.

Just because someone else does well doesn't mean I can't succeed. I try to keep telling myself this, but I think it's one of the areas I need to work on the most. My success doesn't mean someone else has failed, just like my failure doesn't ensure the success of others.

Unfortunately this doesn't just pertain to running. I know as long as I can show improvement and have room to grow that I will continue to try at  activities such as baking and bowling. I will continue to lose weight even though I'm not losing as fast as someone else, as frustrating as that may be. But this competitive "bug" is annoying me.

I want to look at something a friend has done and feel pure excitement for her accomplishments. Sometimes it's like pulling teeth because I want to be at that level so badly. I want to beat them and stay ahead of the game. I want to play chess with the SO and be excited for him that he's played a game so well, rather than disappointed in myself because I feel I played poorly.

They say practice makes perfect, so maybe if I perfect the art of losing (not on purpose) I'll become more relaxed about it. I don't need to be perfect, I just need to be me.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Life gets in the way

Today I am struggling. I am sick. Well, I am on the verge of being sick. Swollen glands have persisted through the week. Not enough to bother me other than to think “oh, my throat’s a little sore” at times. Today it hit at about 10 a.m. Sore throat, headache, nausea and an overwhelming urge to bite everyone’s head off. I’m trying to just get through this. If for some reason I am unable to go to work tomorrow I want whoever has to take over all my crap to have the easiest time possible. I have all my extra work done. And I’ve accomplished the head-biting, but to the wrong person.

So I’ve been struggling. Did I mention that? I’ve been on task for weeks, working out almost daily, staying in my calorie range, even on my “cheat” day yesterday when it was my day off from exercise without any guilty whatsoever and where I got to eat fried chicken. I was still within my calories. Because I’m that good. I’m not really struggling with eating, although I guess that’s a struggle because I’m not hungry at all. I think it has to do with the nausea thing.

But at work, I’m surly, I’m grumpy and I’m trying not to show it because no one here needs to think I’m sick. I don’t want that. So, the first person who calls? The SO. Asks me a simple question and I bite his head off. Partially because I don’t want to tell him I don’t feel well in front of my co-workers and partially because I don’t feel well. Imagine that. Maybe I should just put my foot in my mouth, considering I’m not hungry or anything.